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Probably every woman in India has one story about having been subject to lecherous looks as she has walked down the street. The male gaze turns more brazen by several orders of magnitude.
Ketki Pradhan, a French teacher in Pondicherry, told me about the time she was holding her German boyfriend’s hand when a group of men started making vulgar gestures.
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Nicholas Chevaillier, my friend Aarya’s French-American husband, has been asked more than once in India where and how he “picked up” the woman he was with.
Her experiences in those two years in Mumbai before the couple moved to Los Angeles forever clouded the way Aarya thought of the city in which she had grown up.“Being with my own husband would make me uncomfortable because men would pass lewd comments with even more alacrity than when I was alone,” said Aarya.
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At times she ignored the comments, but when she did try to fight back, some men found the aggression titillating: “! )”At play here is the stereotype that men from the West are interested in women mainly for sexual gratification.
By extension, the Indian women they are with must be promiscuous.
“One of them grabbed my other hand and held it very tightly for a few seconds, and ran away,” Pradhan recalled.
”I was so angry that I shrieked, and we ran after them. Then seeing that I was not going to go, he apologised.”Another time, a group of men sneered as they passed by the young couple: “? )”My friend Neha Belvalkar’s first visit to India after two years in a film school in the US was “appalling,” in her words.